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Cards That Cheer and Comfort

By Arlene F. Harder, MA, MFT

Part One of Three Parts

The genesis of this GRAND Project idea began more than five years ago when a friend developed metastasized breast cancer. Knowing she was the one who had to go through all the tribulations and pain of treatment and that there were lots of us rooting for her, I told her I would hold hope for her if she didn’t feel strong enough to hope for herself. To reinforce that hope and to make certain she knew I was thinking of her, I sent her a greeting card (most of which were home-made) or a copy of an article almost every day. Later, I was to do this with two other friends while they were going through cancer treatment.

My friends looked forward to getting the cards and greatly treasured them. In fact, one of my friends sent me a card with a picture of a teddy bear and the question, "Know why I like you better than my teddy bear?" Inside it said . . . "You hug back." Then her handwritten message said, "You hug back by phone, cards, flowers. Your strength has lifted me up. Love you lots."

The person you love who is dealing with a serious illness or other problem needs your hugs in many forms. GRAND cards are just one way you show your love.

Of course, back when I started doing this, we didn’t have e-mail, so that might have been one way to keep in touch on the days when I wasn’t able to mail something. However, even if we had this marvel of communication and even though I think it’s great to get frequent electronic messages from friends, you can’t hold them in your hands (unless you print them out). You can’t set them on a table or dresser to look at throughout the day. So, my suggestion is that, in addition to sending e-mail, you can also send many real, live, honest-to-goodness cards – for relatively little money.

What do I mean by relatively little money, you ask? Well, if you were to send six store-bought cards a week (taking off Sunday together with the Post Office), that could easily be $20 a week, including postage. Without these GRAND ideas you’re looking at a relatively big expense over what may be a very long period of time. This would especially be true if you have a tight budget and if you also plan to periodically buy your loved one things like flowers or take them to the movies. But with GRAND, you can let your loved one know you are thinking about him or her without spending an arm and a leg.

You can also send free cards if you use a service such as All Yours Greeting Cards and Off the Mark by Mark Parisi.

Cards That Cheer and Comfort CONTINUES in Part Two: Creating GRAND Cards

© Copyright 2000, Arlene Harder, MA, MFT